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Personal Update: Balancing Work, Life and Motherhood

February 23, 2022 by Clare

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Let’s build a snowman.

I’m not really sure what this post is about yet  but I haven’t written anything on here since December last year and so I thought it was about time!

The first huge piece of news is that I’m pregnant again. This baby is due in July, so summer baby this time!

I’ve been thinking a lot about the balance between motherhood, work and life; I’ve been thinking about where my own priorities lie and how everything will all play out in practice. 

So, I guess this post does have a strong theme and probably won’t be as ‘all over the place’ as I think it will. It’s about being a Mum and the age old cliche of balancing everything. 

I still feel like the world is broken into two camps when it comes to motherhood. At one end of the scale, there’s the Stay at home Mum and the other the Independent Working Mum. But, increasingly, and I definitely can’t be the only one – there’s also the third camp of the Mum that wants it all or thinks they have to do it all. Think, the stay at home Mum that has a six figure business on the side.

On social media, I seem to be inundated with examples of this but in reality it occurred to me that I know pretty much no one who has mastered this balance or whether it’s even possible. When my first son was a baby, I felt I had the balance pretty sussed. However, over time I realised how difficult it was to maintain. 

My first priority until my children are at school is to be mainly with them, which is a personal choice. Childcare in London is also ridiculously expensive. Full time nursery is basically a whole months’ salary for a lot of people. 

Being a Mum has made me think a lot about how to balance everything. For example, the average school day in the UK seems to be from 8.30 to 3.30 yet the majority of us are in 9-5 work and most households now require two parents to be in mainly full time work. 

How do most people then make it work with children? I know there are childminders and after school clubs but is this what most people do? And then there are all the school holidays – do most children spend their time at holiday clubs? My parents were both full time teachers and so took their holidays with me, and I went to childminders houses after school. I thought this worked pretty well but I know it was also a lot of work.

I feel very out of touch with how most people manage things logistically. I also think it’s very much about individual choice and I would never judge what someone decides. But the main thing on my mind in terms of long term goals is that I’d like my work to fit around the school day. 

I sometimes wonder what it would be like if I’d stuck to a traditional career and remained in 9-5 work. I know in London certainly people tend to have kids a little later than the rest of the country to first establish their careers. I’ve often wondered about this though, especially if you have a really demanding job. 

I can imagine it being pretty tough to go from high powered job, to maternity leave and then back to your high powered job again. But maybe I’m just saying this because sometimes, I think ‘wouldn’t it be nice to have the security of a regular salary and a career ready and waiting for me once maternity leave was over. 

But the truth is that I didn’t want this and was nowhere near ready to return back to full time work even after a year. I know this will mean a shift in how I work and what I choose to do. 

Shortly after my son was born I started creating an online course which is now complete, but despite being proud of what I made, it hasn’t paid off financially. I love teaching yoga one-to-one. However, in the future I would love a set up where people come to me instead of me travelling to people’s homes to work.

So, my next line of thought has been to retrain in another area of work that requires you to work one-to-one with people but also works alongside yoga. I considered massage, life coaching, yoga therapy, and decided to follow the path of counselling and psychotherapy. I recently signed up to do an introduction to counselling course and am halfway through. I’ve been really enjoying it, so I’ll see where it may or may not lead. 

Admittedly, I love the idea of studying something in depth for a long time as I’ve spent so many years doing lots of short courses and been quite business focused. There’s a big part of me that just wants to write essays now and really study something in detail for a long time. Anyway, these are just some of my current thoughts. 

To conclude this post, here’s a snapshot of some of the books, podcasts, and things I’ve enjoyed over the last year.

Best fiction book I’ve read

Matt Haig’s The Midnight Library (Amazon affiliate link). It’s an easy feel good read that I absolutely loved and couldn’t put down.

Best Non fiction book

On Becoming a Person (Amazon affiliate link) by Carl Rogers. Perhaps it was the author more than the actual book, but I this was the first book I’d read by Rogers and I loved everything about how he thought and saw the world. 

Podcasts listened to

I’ve been a huge Tim Ferriss fan for quite a few years now, so I still listen to him but over the last year, I’ve also binged on the Deliciously Ella podcast again.

My friend Heli and I also started our own podcast called Squiggly Lives which is all about finding purpose

Brain puzzles

I’m back to doing brain puzzles and IQ test questions. I did a 30 day challenge about five years ago, where I basically studied IQ test questions for a month to exercise my brain. I’m back to doing it again and may take an official test afterwards if I’m feeling brave. My favourites are the pattern recognition puzzles. I’ve been practising through the site Intelligence Test (I have no affiliate relationship or partnership with this site)

Latest Mindvalley courses

As a mindvalley member and affiliate, I always have a course on the go. I recently finished Life Visioning Mastery by Michael Beckwith. You can check out his free masterclass below

Discover How To Go Beyond Traditional Manifesting and Live Your Soul’s Purpose (Affiliate Link

Next art/ craft project

I plan to turn all my son’s broken plastic toys including lo longer used or wanted kinder egg surprise toys and magazine freebies, into a colourful rainbow artwork. Watch this space. 

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